Like damn, I just realised how expensive university is as a whole. Just looking at my school fees, I’m almost $9,000 behind and times that by another say 3 years, given I don’t repeat anything, I’ll be roughly $27,000 in debt for my university fees…nah fuck that shit lolol. I don’t even think I’ll be making that much in my lifetime to be honest.
Like since when did college get so expensive though? Shit costs as much as private high-school fees, haha. But yeah, I’m still bummed out that I can potentially get broke from this, if I don’t continue my course or don’t get a job that this degree was meant to get me. I am questioning so much shit right now but seriously, I know cousins and mates who’ve stopped and even graduated from university to end up working in a place that pays like less than $15 per hour. And now these people are working a lot of their lifetime to just pay off the stupid student-loans which didn’t even get them their dream job or anything.
Education system these days are getting pretty stupid, not just here in Australia…I’m talking like globally how bad the education system is (exceptions to Singapore, Korea and Finland; you’re all doing it right). Like ever since this student-loan system came about, universities just boosted up their annual fees and who knows what they’re even spending it on. And what’s worst, people with actual intentions of becoming a profession in a particular field become broke just because they chose to go to university.
To be honest, uni is boring as shit. Like it’s not interactive whatsoever and I don’t know, people at this uni (apart from the jmss colleagues of course) are just flat out boring. Like I’m being so judgmental yeah, but I don’t know there’s not many people who happen to like the same stuff I do and they all are really just different from me, not of my liking if I’m being brutal. Like of course, they’re kind and sweet but like I can just feel the aura that I’m not gonna be talking much to these people for long, like I just know it.
Man I don’t know what to say right now, all seems so complicated to me. As stupid as my reaction is, it’s just still so weird that there has to be an odd number going. The complications that are going to happen over there are like running through my head and are enough for me to reconsider my choice.
Holy shit, I’m just the biggest faggot for thinking of such stupid shit like that. To be honest, as much as I shouldn’t be, I’m still kinda mad at you for trying to bring along other people into this thing. Like yeah, I get your thoughts thinking “the more the merrier” but to be honest, I don’t think it’s gonna end up so well if we got like 5 people going. Yeah, it’s not much but an add number can lead to a lot of weird complications when we’re over there I can imagine.
Also, I was assuming we planned this trip for only 4 people and then yeah, you bring along others which means we have to re-arrange all our other shit. Argh, I’m just so mad at you and I don’t want to talk to you for a while.
To be honest, yeah I do kinda deserve everything that’s happening to me right now. I’ve just been nothing but a detriment to society and all I do is just fuck up everyone else’s lives. I just wish there was a way for me to fix everything, to make everything right again.
I don’t get why a lot of bad things always happen to me though and I don’t seem to ever catch a break. It feels like I’ve lost you as a friend already (yeah, I’m impatient) and this whole easter thing isn’t going to work out as well as I was hoping it would be. Maybe it’s best that I don’t go, I don’t know.
Days like these, I just wish I never existed…like the only thing running through my mind now is how happy everyone would be if I never existed.
Had an awesome day today ice-skating even though it was really really bad weather LOL
I was most certainly not excited for ice-skating though…not as much as anna anyway. I was more scared than anything to be honest since anna told me that if I fell down other skaters may potentially skate through and cut my fingers off, and I’m just like…nope don’t wanna do this anymore. But you know, I had to since I promised myself that I would, and I didn’t wanna let myself down, not again.
And so, I actually made an attempt to ice-skate and yeah…it was hard. However I got the hang of it after long periods of holding onto the rail, HAHA. Just like me, Anna found it hard too so thankfully I was on the same page as her and she got the hang of it too ! Overall, it was a pretty cool experience to ice-skate with some good friends (:
After ice-skating anna had to go work at the clinic, fun fun! so it left myself with the rest of the boys in Clarence’s car. We just suddenly thought “hey, let’s have Korean BBQ at sangwon’s place” and so we went to clayton to buy the meat and what not and also a couple of soft drinks and yeah, we made our way to sangwon’s.
As it turns out, Sangwon has a cooking stove of his own that’s meant for Korean BBQ so that part was settled real quick. Yeah, after setting up everything we got straight into cooking the meat and ooooooooh man it was so damn nice. Sangwon’s mum, who is by far the sweetest lady you’ll ever meet, made us some kimchi and radish as well to go with our meat which made the lunch heaps better. It was good to just kick back and talk to the guys while having some REAL nice food. We decided that we should have more days like this, it’s so nice.
What do you do…when you find out that absolutely nothing goes your way? I just want to end my life right now, it seems like I’m just not good enough for anything in this world. How am I going to be sure that everything is going to get better? I just really don’t want to live the rest of my life, not after everything that’s happened.
Holy shit, only a miracle can save me now. I’m just hoping and praying that it’ll all get better soon enough. It sure feels like my life as a whole has hit rock bottom, although something tells me there’s gotta be more crashing and burning to come.
Offers came out today and well…not as a good turn out as I’d hoped haha, but I suppose I do get what I deserve. I’m still bummed out that I didn’t pick straight up Pharmacy and I find out a cousin of mine who got a lower ATAR than me got into Pharmacy LOL.
A bit REAL stupid of me to doubt my chances of getting into pharmacy, but nah I’m still happy for everyone who got into those particular courses; they all deserve it after a hardcore year 12 year.
It’s been a while since I’ve taken a look at some sneakers, but after my mate asked me about it, I actually decided to look around at the forums and sites I usually go on to look at sneakers. He also asked what shoes I’d recommend to wear on the court. I told him it was more of a personal choice rather than a recommendation from someone else. Although I thought about it and I’ve decided on what I thought my top 5 basketball shoes are:
5. Under Armour Micro G Black Ice
I just thought these shoes were really simple yet cool in a way. The design of it is actually not bad and it seems really comfortable to wear, so I wouldn’t mind having these on my feet. It’s funny how it wasn’t Brandon Jennings that got me looking at these shoes; it was these shoes that got me watching Brandon Jennings in the NBA.
4. Nike Zoom KD IV
I didn’t get to look at sneakers much in 2012 cause of VCE, but I think that these shoes are by far the best basketball shoe of that year. I’m just a fan of that strap on the shoe, not sure why. Then again, I’m also a fan of Kevin Durant…so maybe that has some impact on why I like this shoe.
3. Adidas AdiZero Ghost
I never got to wear this shoe, but man it looks so good. I remember when I was versing Wellington for the District competition I saw a mate wear these and I just couldn’t take my eyes off them. If I had a choice to wear an Adidas shoe, it’d be this one, nothing else.
2. Air Jordan Retro Shanghai Shen 5
If any of you guys get me this, I will love you forever. I want these so bad and I search day and night for them, but I just can’t find them in Australia. I mean, they’re obviously exclusive to China, but still. I just hope that one day I’ll be able to go to China and get this beautiful pair of kicks, I don’t really care what price I’d have to pay for this…I just have that “I need ‘em” mentality for these pair of sneakers. The colourway of it just reminds me of the times I use to play ball for Wellington, since the uniform was a beautiful royal blue and yellow, much like this shoe.
1. Nike Hyperize
I don’t think anything will ever make me lose my love for these shoes. I remember these were the first pair of basketball sneakers I ever wore, and I still have that same pair. I’d love to have this colourway though, looks beautiful. But overall, it’s just so comfortable…I feel like I can break the sound barrier when I’m running with these since it’s so light. My love for these sneakers will never go away.